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No funny business
  |  First Published: November 2012



At least they thought it was funny. Manboobs and Skipper I mean. I didn’t. But that’s often the way isn’t it, when the bad thing is happening to you.

I don’t suppose the blokes that fell over in front of Steven Bradbury get the tape out and have a giggle. “No wait, wait, here it comes. Here’s where I fall over and I trip up the other two blokes and the Aussie who was coming last skates past us to get the Gold. Ha ha ha, get ready here it comes. Wait. Wait. There! What a cack. Can you believe it? Ahh, funny.”

I don’t think so.

So I was not amused when it was my rod that broke in the middle of fighting a good fish. Granted, I tend to be a little ‘careful’ when it comes to purchasing fishing gear. Like the time I found the top of a rod in the Condamine River, so I bored a hole in a busted off axe handle, stuck the end of the rod down there and then attached an old reel on to it with hose clamps. Perhaps a little tight with my money might be more accurate. Something about tighter than a mullet’s bum comes to mind.

Anyway, it hardly ever gets me into trouble, but this time it did. The rod looked perfectly alright when I picked it up from the second hand shop for ten clams. And it had caught the odd fish before that. It was just that this fish was a little larger than normal. And of course, it happened to be the only fish any of the three legends fishing that day had managed to hook on to.

And everyone knows that there’s a much better chance of dropping a fish if it’s the only one you hook all day. Somehow it seems that when the fish are really biting, you don’t lose any. It’s only when you really want to get at least one measly fish into the boat that everything comes unglued.

Not that my rod came unglued actually. More like just snapped straight in half. And even though I tried to reel it in with half a rod it was not to be. A good trumpie I think, or perhaps a jack. Something about me trying to get this fish into the boat seemed to strike a chord with Skipper and Boobs anyway. I’m sure I wouldn’t have laughed if something bad happened to them. Like if Boobs Phone fell in the water. Oh hang on, actually I did laugh. Or when Skipper got three snags in three casts. Ah, yeah, I may have giggled at that too. But they laughed longer and harder I bet.

So anyway that’s why I invested in a nice new rod and reel last week. Good little unit it is too, for a good price. Not the top of the line stuff, I can’t afford that, but a good solid piece of gear.

And I do tend to be a little superstitious when it comes to trying out new gear too. That’s why I approached the weekend’s trip with a little anxiety. You see, I believe the first fish you catch with a new rod is important. Don’t know why, that’s just something that runs through my mind.

When I ended up with a perch followed by a forktailed catfish, I wasn’t all that happy. I mean, if there are two fish that you don’t want to catch a lot of, it’s those two.

But then again, looking on the bright side, I did get them into the boat, and the rod stayed in one piece too. And no one laughed at me. They were catching exactly the same thing. You have to be thankful for small mercies I suppose.

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